Since we’re scaling back on spending this year, I’ve decided to do food gifts for everyone in addition to a very small actual gift (or money/gift card to somewhere) for the people on our Christmas lists. I know that a lot of times, recipients end up throwing the items away after letting them go stale… I’ve done it myself. What I like to do is make up a tin of goodies. Here’s what I’m including so far:

- peanut butter and/or chocolate fudge
- peppermint bark
- brown sugar shortbread cookies
- buckeyes (possibly, if I’m brave enough to make them)

What would make you NOT throw one of these gifts away? I’m going to tailor it somewhat to each person and include things I know they like, but I also need a master list of basics. I might try some gingersnaps or something, too. I saw an idea for using holiday-themed cupcake liners to arrange the cookies, etc inside the tin to keep it neat so I need to buy those before the stores run out. Throw your ideas my way! 

I have about three days to make a big decision about my job. We’re opening a new store in Lebanon, about 15 minutes from where we live, and 20 from our current store. I’ve been feeling The Burnout at my store for a while now, so I decided that I would probably look into transferring when the new one started hiring. Now it’s here and I don’t know what I want to do. I don’t want to go for the wrong reasons, but I don’t want to stay out of fear of change either. I’m in that comfort zone, and this will be a bigger store with bigger challenges and more responsibility. Most of me knows that I need that. I’ve been with the company for thirteen years, so I’m feeling a bit stale right now. Some of me is scared of the “what-ifs”.

What if I do go, and I hate it? There’d be no turning back, as our store is already over head count as far as managers go (they can’t make you leave if you’re doing a good job, but if you do leave, you couldn’t come back as a manager). What if I can’t handle the bigger store? What if I’m creating this big scenario where transferring will fix everything but it doesn’t and it sucks and I’m even more unhappy than I am now and and and….

I think most of my problem is fear of change. The best friend is applying too, but he would interviewing to actually move up a level. So if he went too, at least I’d know someone there and it wouldn’t be so bad. Our current boss is going there after Christmas, so I’d know her. I’m just stuck in the day-to-day comfort zone like I said, and that’s hard to break out of. I’m taking this weekend to think about it and talk it over with John, then I need to talk to my boss on Monday about it. Interviews are next Thursday. Advice?

I successfully cooked a Thanksgiving dinner that turned out wonderfully and got mad props (I aced the turkey!), but have nothing to show for it because I forgot to take pictures! Yes, I am one of those people who likes to take pictures of food… well more so the complete spread on the table is what I had planned to photograph. I’ll remember for Christmas. We had a small group of five with myself and John, my brother, dad and grandma. I had SO much fun preparing the meal for them, and I can’t wait to do it for the bigger group at Christmas. If they don’t all have to work, John’s family will be joining us as well which brings us to ten or so.

So Black Friday… crazy as usual but honestly, not that bad. All the people I encountered were in good spirits and pretty laid back. Actually, it was Saturday that brought out the ass clowns. Love being yelled at before I’ve had coffee, it’s great. All in all, the whole weekend was pretty uneventful. No fights, no deaths, no shootings… seriously what the hell is wrong with people? I’ve seen a woman smack another over a Tickle-Me-Elmo, but stampedes and guns? I don’t even know what to think about it all. I’m just glad it didn’t happen here.

My next mission? How to afford presents for all on my list with limited funds and only one more paycheck before Christmas. Yeeeah. 

Simply put, I am a bundle of nerves. Now that I think about it, I have been for quite some time now. Getting through my best friend’s wedding (an actual event, not the movie) was a test I barely passed. That’s over and done with, and he and I seem to be on a path to recovery, for lack of a better phrase. Now the approaching holidays have me snapping at anything in my path and have left me a blubbery mess. I’ve been seeking out every tiny thing I can find to start an argument about with John, and today he finally had enough. We were going out to get some Coke and grab something to eat, got into it at the gas station and ended up at Bed, Bath and Beyond to buy serving spoons. I yelled, he yelled, my waterworks began and he got all quiet. After several minutes of silence, I said something that suddenly made so much sense… “you have no idea how hard the holidays are for me. I really think I hate my parents”.

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